Yes, the TV academy’s annual Emmy Awards are coming up fast, and the ceremony at which they are announced will be broadcast live this Sunday night—but I’m sorry to inform you that you’re going to have to be on your own on this one. I just can’t watch them. These award ceremonies bore the life out of me, and who wins which one usually just confirms what we already know about the strange and elaborate system of values in Hollywood. However, as a public service to those of our loyal readers who are able to care about the matter, here’s a link to a story about what people with way too much time on their hands are speculating about regarding this year’s awards, from E! Online.