Steven Weber, who starred in “Wings,” is a contributor to that font of mainstream Hollywood liberal thought, The Huffington Post. Can’t quite place Steven Weber? C’mon. Don’t you remember that NBC sitcom? It’s the one where the guys who played supporting characters — like the imbecile mechanic (Thomas Hayden Church) and the immigrant taxi driver (Tony Shalhoub) — went on to be big stars.
Apparently, Weber — always billed as a “star” of that show (Weber was the cute, younger of the two protagonist brothers) — still isn’t over his professional disappointment since that show’s demise … more than a decade ago. Seems these days Weber passes the lonely months on end of his phone not ringing by wringing out his tear-filled hanky of broken dreams on the HuffPost. “Tear-filled” doesn’t quite hit it. Let’s say “rage-filled.” And boy does Weber hate anyone who doesn’t imbibe the (heavily spiked) liberal Kool-Aid as often as he does.
Under Weber’s name on his HuffPosts are the words “Actor, wise-ass.” He fits the bill, at least the second part — especially if you take out the word “wise.” Though aren’t we supposed to feel at least a little bit of “aw shucks” affection for the Hollywood wise-ass? Weber needs some of direction based on his latest screed titled: “What to Do (This Time, Sober).”
We’ll have to take Weber’s word for his parenthetical clarification, because if this is a sober post, I’d hate to read Weber’s thoughts when he’s on the sauce. And the “What to Do” part is directed at most contributors and readers of this blog. Weber’s idea of “what to do” about us is not very pleasant. Even by the low standards of Hollywood political punditry, Weber’s latest is pretty asinine. I’m reluctant to draw attention to Weber’s latest rant — my wife has the stomach to regularly visit The Huffington Post; I don’t — because after having his post up all day since a bit before noon on Valentine’s Day, Weber solicited all of 11 comments, eight Facebook shares and zero re-tweets buy well past sundown. (You’re welcome for the hits, Steven. Please, don’t send a gift.)
One can hardly get past the first sentence without a hearty guffaw. Weber writes: “It’s time to tear the mask from their smug, stupid faces.” Let’s just say Weber, in the role of his dreams, is pulling apart the buttons from his shirt and dashing down the street to reveal a giant blue “S” on his chest for “Smug Man.” Or is it “Stupid Man.” You can decide, as you read on. Second paragraph:
Liberals — or anyone who has sense and cares about their country — need to gird themselves against an enemy that looks American and squawks American but is as destructive to American principles as any brown shirt-wearing, fascist sociopath.
Forget that nonsense that only liberals have “sense and care about their country.” But remember that “brown shirt” reference. We’ll get to that later. Remember the “enemy” part, too. Third graf:
Every dumbass bromide that issues forth from the twisted mouths of a pseudo-libertarian or armchair conservative blowhard must be met with a confident rejoinder, one that has the backing of truth and facts.
That’s a “confident rejoinder,” all right. But what is Weber getting to? When will he show off his death grip on “truth and facts”? We continue …
Every attention seeking stunt on the part of a right wing media lackey must be ignored, or derided for the raving, fear mongering assholery it is and then turned off with one, easy click of a button.
So … which is it? Should liberal intellectual giants like Weber (obviously his target audience) “deride” opponents? Or should they ignore them by, apparently, turning off Fox News?
Be not afraid of the birthers, baggers, deathers, those who decry “the killing of Christmas” or whatever lunatic froth that issues from their sad, desperate brains. They haven’t the guts to back their fiery words up with action. And they are, in many cases, way too fat to move very fast.
“Deathers”? That’s a new one. And Weber’s one to talk about “lunatic froth” when he’s already thrown out enough digital spittle — in just five paragraphs — to get a camel from Casablanca to Egypt. And back. Oh, and I’d be careful about those fat jokes, Steven. Remember those hot clubs you used to get into when people recognized you? In those minutes waiting outside (a travesty, I know), did you ever see a skinny bouncer? There’s a reason for that.
Sitting back and letting elected officials do the citizens’ work will result in only more static, more confusion and breathe further breath into the lungs of those quasi-conservative zombots who know nothing of history or need to reinterpret it, in fact, to fit their low brow schemes, therefore allowing more division, thinly-veiled xenophobia, and outright idiocy to reign widespread as it does now.
Yes. That was all one sentence. All 63 words of it. But there, in the mess Weber made of that passage, he raises the liberal skirt too far above the ankle. Note that “letting elected officials do the citizens’ work,” in his mind, is a very bad thing. Damn democracy! Damn the ability of we “zombots” to express in person, online, and at the ballot box our dissatisfaction with the agenda of Barack Obama and Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid! Such “division” cannot be tolerated, because it only results in “more static” and “more confusion.” Oh, and “idiocy.”
And it’s we “tea-bagging ass-hats” (in Weber’s lexicon) who know nothing of the history of this country. We are the idiots. We who cherish the Founders’ vision to institute a political and constitutional order in which sobriety, and not Weber’s brand of passion and all sorts of “low-brown schemes,” rules when establishing our society. The U.S. Constitution has served us well in the 221-plus years since its ratification to preserve our freedoms. The irony — of course, lost on Weber — is that America’s Founding Fathers purposely set out to establish the kind of society that was protected from the European model.
The semi-democratic (at least in Britain) yet still autocratic society in Europe of the late 18th Century did not cherish individual liberty. What America witnessed was 200 years of misery. From the French Revolution, to the Napoleonic Wars, to a pair of World Wars, to Soviet domination of half the continent, Europe could have used a bit of unleavened wisdom from our Founders. They didn’t take it. And within the lifetime of Weber’s father, a man was lifted to power on the passions of his countrymen — and he was the one who brought the term “brown shirts” into the modern lexicon. It’s a term Weber throws around quite recklessly through ignorance.
I’ll admit it. This is a lot of ones and zeros to dedicate to a man as insignificant at Steven Weber. But when a prominent poster on a sight as well-read and respected by the MSM as The Huffington Post produces such bile, it warrants a response. I was struck by Weber’s ending passages, directed at people who think like him.
Be resourceful. Be diligent. Be independent. Revere the elderly. Be tender to the helpless. Be fearless in the face of obstructionists. Be humble. Be smart.
But, apparently, don’t be “tender” to those poor elderly people who might not be on the Obama/Reid/Pelosi Express. Give them Hell! Because they are “enemies” whose “instincts often crawl in the dirt and prevent [my] dreams from ever becoming reality.” Because, Weber says: “That is what the right wingers are, after all: killers of dreams.”
Killer of your dreams, Steven? Gladly.
Alas, another Alec Baldwin wannabe… these people want the publicity with none of the bad aspects. Steven is dying for ANY publicity, by cowing to the liberal hollywood types. They generalize, they think ‘rightwing’ means gay-hating, anti-abortion, wacko Christians and wont see their own seething hatred. Too bad.
And Gary, possibly Steven himself: I wouldn’t lecture people about sentence structure. Not when you made two mistakes.
Your statement should read: “Give me a break! You sound like the self-righteous prig that you poorly write about. Learn proper sentence structure.”
Go back to English class, Gary/Steven.
“Great article. Typical liberal full of venom and hatred (and stupidity.) Gary must be Weber himself.”
That’s what I’m thinking, Bertrand. If he isn’t Steven, then he’s just as lame and misguided as the man-child he’s so eager to defend.
I can’t believe I was *ever* a fan of Steven “Man-Child” Weber. At least when I’m watching, “Wings,” I’m able to forget about the nasty things he said about me and my fellow conservatives.
That’s right, Stevie Boy! I’m one of those conservatives that you bashed. I used to be a fan of yours. Guess what, Stevie Boy? You just lost yourself a fan! Brilliant move, you hate-filled has-been!!
Great article. Typical liberal full of venom and hatred (and stupidity.) Gary must be Weber himself.
Poorly structured article. It appears you are as elitist as those you write about.
Give me a break, you sound like the self righteous prig that you poorly write about. Learn proper sentence structure.
Thanks, for the comments guys. Weber’s rant was almost too silly to write about. Almost …
Thanks for this informative piece, Jim. I fully understand that there are a good many insane idiots in Hollywood and elsewhere in the elitist demonisphere, but this is a particularly vivid and amusing example of the breed.
Jim — Don’t they tell actors these days to connect with their inner being, regardless of whether they’re doing drama or comedy? Clearly, Weber’s inner being is on display here, and it’s just as repugnant as his persona on WINGS: the perennial wise-ass whom I wouldn’t trust with my dog, much less my life. In just about every scene he was in I had this uncomfortable feeling there was a screw loose somewhere, and now he’s confirmed it himself.
“Be resourceful. Be diligent. Be independent. Revere the elderly. Be tender to the helpless. Be fearless in the face of obstructionists. Be humble. Be smart.” — To which we might diligently, tenderly, fearlessly, and humbly add these from Zorro: “Spread the news … that he is back! To help the helpless! To befriend the friendless! And to defeat the … feetless!”