Upon hearing that ABC was planning to do a new series of Charlie’s Angels three decades after the show ended, one might be forgiven for expecting the show to be like its predecessor: entertaining in the classic Hollywood way—frankly hedonistic while expressing devotion to popular causes and a generalized love for mankind and desire that people just be nice to one another.
The producers appear to know that glamour and pleasure-seeking were central to the original show’s appeal: the pilot episode of the new series begins in a swinging Miami, Florida, disco atmosphere. The story quickly kicks in with the kidnapping of a teenage girl, and the hedonistic element is conveyed by the fast cars, bosomy dames, and the loud eurodisco music behind most of the first action scene. The three fashion-model-attractive private detection operatives known as Charlie’s Angels set out to find and rescue her, under the direction of their unseen boss, Charlie Townsend, and his assistant, Bosley.
Unfortunately for those who like the classic Hollywood formula of morally infused fun, the new Charlie’s Angels manifests a strong urge to be meaningful, “dark,” and consequential. That would be a good thing if the show were successful at it, but unfortunately the new version is really no deeper or more thoughtful than the original. And it’s much less fun.
At this point the show is clearly trying hard to hit all the necessary marks for a jolly Hollywood entertainment: sex, violence, and a generalized sense of benevolence.
Soon, however, the Darkness creeps in. It is revealed that each of the angels has emotional problems (as is the case for the regular characters in every contemporary network TV police procedural or suspense show), and then, predictably, one of the angels is killed. (This has become a commonplace for season-opening or series-opening episodes since CSI: Crime Scene Investigation originated in in 2000.) Adding a big figure to the cliche quotient, blonde angel Abby says, “I never thought my heart could hurt this much.”
Same here.
The terminated angel is soon replaced by a new one (Minka Kelly of Friday Night Lights), whom, predictably, the other angels initially refuse to accept. Meanwhile, their boss, Charlie, conveys the show’s generalized benevolence by telling his charges, “Just remember, your’e angels of justice, not angels of revenge.” Those watching at home quickly set their dvrs to “pause” and leave the room to clean the up-snorted beverages from their shirtfronts.
As all of this suggests, the cliches of both action and dialogue are provided in truly astounding profusion throughout the episode. As to the sense of fun one has a right to expect from this project, alas, there really is little of that. The crime story deals with human trafficking, a very poor setting for any sense of adventure. In this context the occasional attempts at humor or lightness of tone are not very effective. In addition, whereas the original series did try to put some topical issues in the stories, this one is all very obvious heroes-and-villains stuff—it’s difficult, after all, to find many nuances in the issue of human trafficking.
The episode strains for significance: the murdered angel and her replacement were raised by nuns in El Salvador, but not much is made of this, other than as the setting of an atrocity by criminals a recounted by the new angel. There is even a scene in which one of the angels is tortured by the main villain and his henchmen.
On the whole, the lead actresses do a decent job of portraying their characters, but there isn’t much of interest for them to do. Charlie is unseen, but his voice is not very distinguished, unlike that of ultra-smooth John Forsythe in the original. Bosley, the angels’ direct overseer, is young and handsome, an MIT grad, a Latino, and as martial arts expert. In the original series, he was a rather dumpy fellow played amiably by David Doyle.
Presumably, Bosley has been given this makeover to give the females in the audience something to look at. Yet it was a good deal more fun, and the angels’ accomplishments more impressive, when Bosley wasn’t pitching in with his own action heroics.
That’s the odd thing about the new Charlie’s Angels. As the sense of fun has been lost, so has much of the meaning of the show. As has the entertainment value.