Four hours with Mr. Monk …

… for most people would seem like a lifetime. TV mystery fiction’s first obsessive-compulsive detective (unless you admit some of Hercule Poirot’s nervous tics as indicative of OCD) would likely drive most people up the wall in less than four minutes.

This year marks the last season of Monk, and I thought it might be worthwhile to commemorate the series by selecting the four episodes that most exemplified the show’s basic premise: mystery with comedy (or, if you prefer, comedy with mystery). It wouldn’t be surprising if you don’t agree with these choices.

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"Mr. Monk and the Sleeping Suspect" (2003)

Monk: He’s the guy.
Stottlemeyer: Who?
[Monk indicates Brian, who is in a coma]
Stottlemeyer: Him? Monk, he’s a vegetable! He’s not even a vegetable! He hopes to one day be a vegetable!
… All right, so … Brian built the bomb, and then Brian mailed the bomb, by himself.
Monk: That’s right.
Stottlemeyer: While he was in a coma.
Monk: [admiringly] You gotta admit—it’s a pretty good alibi. It’s rock solid!
Stottlemeyer: Monk, I have known 15,000 criminals in my lifetime. Here’s what they all have in common: they’re conscious!
Monk: Nonetheless.
Stottlemeyer: Is your shrink coming back soon?

"Mr. Monk and the 12th Man" (2003)

Mrs. Ling: You come back anytime, Mr. Babcock. You good customer, ’cause you don’t complain.
Lt. Disher: Ma’am, he just killed eleven people.
Stottlemeyer: Twelve. Let’s not forget about the first Mrs. Babcock, who I’ll bet is buried under that new porch.
Mrs. Ling: Yeah, well … he still good customer. Not crazy like that Mr. Monk over there.

"Mr. Monk Goes to the Carnival" (2003)

Capt. Stottlemeyer: Hey, Randy, did I ever tell you about Monk’s first day as a detective?
Lt. Disher: No, sir.
Capt. Stottlemeyer: Take a seat. [Randy does] He didn’t have a partner, so I got stuck with him.
Lt. Disher: Was he, uh …? [motions to his head]
Capt. Stottlemeyer: No, no. He was … a little wound. He used to clean the windshield and rearrange the glovebox before we’d roll. Anyway, we’re the primaries on a body at a hotel in the Castro. A hooker had swallowed a bunch of promazine—you know, the big sleeping pills?
Lt. Disher: Horse tranquilizers, sir.
Capt. Stottlemeyer: I said suicide. Every cop on the scene said suicide. Medical examiner said suicide. Monk walks in, says murder. "Where’s the water?" The room had no water! Simple. Eight people in the room, but nobody saw that.
Lt. Disher: Well, I’m sure you would have seen it eventually, sir …
Capt. Stottlemeyer: Don’t kid yourself. There is only one … Adrian Monk.

"Mr. Monk and the Panic Room" (2004)

Stottlemeyer: They call it a panic room. I know that’s a difficult concept because, for you, every room is a panic room.
Monk: Thank you.

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If, after the series ends, you still haven’t had enough of Mr. Monk, Lee Goldberg is currently producing a series of new novels featuring the character and narrated by Natalie Teeger.

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… and three with Mrs. Fletcher.

There were 264 episodes of Murder, She Wrote spread over 12 seasons—a respectable run for any TV series. Here are the three shows that, for me, were ingenious and invited the viewer to play along with Jessica in discovering the culprit.

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"Death Casts a Spell" (1984)

"Murder Takes the Bus" (1985)

"Trial by Error" (1986)

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—Mike Gray